My friend said this after reading Ibra’s autobiography, “I am Zlatan” and it stuck with me. So I made a banner. This here is the image. The banner size version is after the jump.

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Rooting for

October 13, 2010

This season, I’m even more a sucker for lost causes than I usually am. Ali Habsi, why did you have to go to Wigan? You know I’m obligated to follow you since you’re the only Omani player to play in the EPL, right? Sigh.

So this season, it’s
EPL: Wigan Athletic, Arsenal
Arsenal’s the quintessential lost cause. They’re an aesthete like me’s dream. They play beautifully and with astounding grace but they choke against bigger clubs. They’ve got Chamakh this season so hopefully between him and Van Persie, they’ll be a little bit more ruthless in their finishing.

La Liga: Atletico Madrid, Barcelona
I won’t support Real and I’m feeling less and less love for Barcelona after that stupid bit this summer where they tried to guilt-trip Fabregas into joining them.

Bundesliga: Mainz, Hoffenheim, Bayern
Yeah, Mainz is up top right now but they’re new and inexperienced and will inevitably disappoint me. But for the moment, Holtby and co. are in fine form. I didn’t start out this season supporting them but I expect to support them for a long while. Hoffenheim’s practically a village club but like Mainz, they benefit from a really young, really open-minded attacking coach. Bayern’s an old favorite but they’ve had the worst start to the season ever and everyone’s injured and nothing they do makes the ball go over the line.

Serie A: AC Milan, Napoli
I like Lucarelli. He’s injured now but still. I like Livorno so I like Napoli. I also like Maradona. Another reason. They’re doing relatively well. Now, AC Milan. I like Ibrahimovic and Ronaldinho and Pirlo and the thought of them together made me jizz my pants. I have a complicated relationship with AC Milan who were the team I originally wanted to support in my youth. Here’s how it went: My buddy Valencio had a bunch of knockoff jerseys we had to kiss ass for in order to use when I was about 7 or 8. This was in Sur, Oman, long before I knew what football really was. We played on this rocky pitch where if you were tackled and fell, you could be reasonably certain you would bleed. My only goal at that point was to avoid injury, which meant I learned to avoid tackles like a motherfucker. So anyway, by the time jerseys were doled out, AC Milan, the one I wanted, was gone and I was stuck with Inter Milan, who I considered a poor second choice. To this day, I’m glad I didn’t get Juventus, who are my most hated team in the world.

And finally, my usual perennial favorite, the shitty team that is my heart: Sweden, who I’ve supported since ’93. Yeah, they’ve got Ibrahimovic and Toivonen now but good goddamn, that’s possibly the worst defense in the world.